However, besides financial concerns, I had never lived alone since young. I have fond memories of sharing my room with people. While growing up, I shared the room with my sister. In high school, I slept with my aunt in her room. In college, I first shared a tiny room with three girls of odd but pleasant personalities before I moved to another apartment where my roommate wouldn’t speak to me at all unless I asked her something, to which her reply, was a terse ‘yes’ or ‘no’. Come third year in college, I had my first taste of “independence” when my college friends and I decided to rent a two-bedroom flat. We chipped in to buy household equipment. Finally, that Hansel and Gretel boarding house became my home since senior year until I left Manila for Singapore. I shared my spacious room with three ladies, one of whom was again my sister, whom I insisted to join our beds together, to her dismay. Little did I know that she was trying to break away from my presence, while I was trying to cling on to our childhood experience of sharing a single bed.
In my first year in Singapore, I tried to scrimp myself by staying in a dormitory with three other youngsters to share the room with. I was bound by a one-year contract so all I could do was to move from one room to another, hoping to find the right mix of girls/ladies in the room. I guessed nothing was perfect but I eventually settled in a room with a pleasant Chinese girl named Wendy and the other two girls, who weren’t memorable to me at all!
As my contract was about to expire, I prayed to find a room in a flat rented by Filipinos. I scoured the advertisements at pinoysg.com, checked interesting posts, found several disappointing ones (Indeed, you can never change one’s upbringing by simply moving to a more comfortable life abroad!). When I was about to give up and resolved to extend my dorm contract for another six months, I found my ideal room in an ideal flat with an ideal roommate and flatmates in an ideal location. I stayed there for a year and six months until I decided to go back to Manila.
My return to Manila was made comfortable through an old friend’s hospitality where I shared the room with a high school friend who never thought we’d get along in the same room. But we did, didn’t we? Or did you just put up with me?
That place was my last foray to roommate world before I decided to venture into an unchartered path of solitary habitation. Here’s someone who’s never lived alone in a room, who is terrified to find herself an unhealthy companion to herself. Then I remember a quote I found on a poster in one of my former roommate’s room, “Do you love the company that you keep when you are alone?”
So what has it been like so far?
I moved in on Saturday through my younger brother’s help. But on Friday evening, I dropped by the flat to deliver my groceries and check if my bed, table, and chairs had been delivered. When I entered my tiny flat, I was surprised to realize that this tiny place can be liveable after all, now that it is adorned with a bed, table, and chairs! I sat there relishing the experience. And for the first time, I looked forward to staying in my own place. I wanted to see how I can transform the place with my presence and how I’d behave in private. Would I bring boys now that I have the liberty to do so? Lol!
On Saturday evening, when my brother already left me and I was all alone in the flat, I thought I’d feel lonely and started texting my friends. To my surprise, I found myself pleased with the solitude. I basked in cleaning my place, putting up curtains, and assembling the little furniture that I have. Could it be that there is just a part of me that has been longing to be alone and only now has it been given the chance to be realized? Then I started to be grateful for the opportunities that I currently have. For instance, without a good job that I enjoy, I would never be able to afford living alone. He has taken me to unchartered paths since graduating in July last year. Maybe, it is indeed true that life can never be better unless you allow Him to take you to the direction He has planned for you. I am not saying that I am at the best time of my life right now. But I must say, I am at peace with where I am now, no longer bothered. Maybe I am ought to learn something about myself in this new experience.
I am definitely thankful for the large windows. I often told my most recent roommate that I wish for an affordable flat with large windows that I can look through as I drink my coffee and study or write, with relaxing music in the background. And of course, a flat near my workplace, i.e., in the middle of the city, but where the sound of the rooster (in lieu of the chirping of the birds) would welcome me in the morning.
For now, thank You!
Here are before and after photos of the flat.
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| The tiny flat before I moved in |
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| Enjoying my first meal on Sunday |
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| Drinking coffee by the window while writing |
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| The view from my bedside window at night |
